Desirable Qualities Of Surrogate Mothers
A surrogate mother or gestational carrier is the one who carries and gives birth to the child on behalf of the intended parents. She is the woman who can make the plans of surrogacy come true for a childless couple or single male or gay couples. A surrogate mother can be a gestational surrogate or a traditional surrogate. In this article, we will discuss the desirable qualities of surrogate mothers.
A traditional surrogate is a woman who uses her own egg for the fertilization process. The infant is biologically linked to the surrogate mother. For traditional surrogacy, the father’s intended sperm is artificially inseminated into the surrogate. She then brings the infant to birth and then hands it over to her intended parents/father.
A gestational surrogate has no maternal link to the child in gestational surrogacy. Thus, she is not considered the child’s maternal mother. This is achieved by using the intended father’s sperm and his wife’s eggs/egg donor eggs to create the embryos. The embryo is then transferred to the surrogate mother in the hope of implantation.
Being a surrogate mother is not an easy task. She has to make a lot of changes in her lifestyle, and physical changes. However not all women can be surrogate mothers. There are some desirable qualities of surrogates, which are not requirements, but if these qualities are present, she can be an ideal surrogate mother.
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The top 10 desirable qualities of a surrogate mother are –
#1. Surrogates must be driven by a genuine desire to help
Giving birth to a child is a huge deal to step too. A surrogate may feel empathetic towards an intended parent who is unable to conceive his or her own child and who wants to send one of the greatest gifts in life to the intended parents for their happiness and fulfillment.
There is, of course, compensation involved, but look for a surrogate mother whose principal reason to become a surrogate is no financial compensation. She should have a genuine desire to help as well.
#2. Surrogates must be empathetic
A surrogate mother generally does not know the pain of being infertile or the problems you face when you don’t have a child of your own. But she must empathize with the intended parents as to what it is being infertile. Maybe the love for your own children will make you empathize with the intended parents or some other reason. But if you can empathize with them then only you can offer genuine help to the intended parents.
#3. A Surrogate must have a great personality
The surrogate mother will have the ability, during the surrogacy cycle, to establish a relationship not only with the agency but with the intended parents. She will be easy to get along with, and who wants to make the whole experience fun for her and the intended parents?
When you have an outstanding surrogate mother, ideally, you’ll feel like she’s a part of the family!
#4. Surrogate must have a sound mind
It’s also important to remember that your surrogate mother is going to go through a lot of emotional issues, maybe balancing her job, her own children, and her personal life in addition to carrying a baby for another family. As a hopeful parent who wants to start a family or complete his family, you want your surrogate mother to have a sound mind, ready to cope with the stress that comes with being a surrogate.
#5. Surrogates must have a strong support system
You are going to want a surrogate mother with a good support network. Will this surrogate prospect have the requisite resources to go to her various appointments, medical screening, travel for the transition, day-care or someone to watch her children as she goes for delivery? Therefore, a surrogate must be surrounded by equally compassionate family members be it parents, friends, or spouse.
#6. Surrogate must be a good communicator
The surrogacy cycle for a parent can be a long and complicated journey. The last thing any parent wants to have a kid is to have a mother who isn’t a great communicator. There will be several times when you’ll have questions and you may want to get to know your surrogate mother beyond the initial conversation. You may want to keep track of her progress during her surrogacy process.
#7. Surrogates must have sound health
Part of raising a safe baby starts with the mom’s health. How is a history of surrogate health different from the history of pregnancy you ask? Is she of the required weight, and maintains her health? Tell your surrogate provider if they have a full review of the medical history of your surrogate including all her pregnancies and if they have a paper record.
#8. Surrogate must not be in for the money
In other cases, it causes negligence on the part of the surrogate mother, excessive stress for those concerned, and ultimately a negative experience if the surrogate mother is only interested in “who pays her the heftiest.” You want the surrogate mother to be inspired by performing an act of providing her body to give you a baby that will complete the family!
#9. Surrogate must be open
You’ll get your private life under a microscope. Next, the surrogacy service will screen you. There’s so much to search for you, from your financial reports to your health records. So, for a year, you will have this odd couple intruding into your life. They’re going to shadow you, ask questions, and want details. It is not for a shy lady.
#10. Surrogate must be patient
As a surrogate, there is plenty to go through. Each pregnancy is full of medical appointments, details, and physical adjustments to keep track of. As a surrogate, you have extra complexity from the implantation of the embryos, the legal issues, the specific extra issues of the paperwork, and the queries and reporting to the intended parents. That needs patience.
Conclusion for desirable qualities of surrogate mothers
Therefore, being a surrogate mother is not an easy task. These desirable qualities of surrogate mothers make them better candidates and improve their selection process to be a gestational carrier, but are not required to be a surrogate mother.
If you’d like to learn more about IVF, Egg Donation, or surrogacy services globally, check out the rest of our website: IVF Conceptions. We offer legally secure and affordable surrogacy consulting services for FREE.
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